Wham!

No, not the group. :o) This is the sound made when you get a smackdown, and I got one today - of sorts.

This is going to get extremely personal, so gentlemen, if you don't want to read this, stop now.

It's a genetic trait in my family for the females to have really bad menstrual cycles. My mother had them until she had her first baby, my older sister (my brother was adopted). So, I haven't really thought it unusual when I would have terrific pain in my abdomen before, during and after my cycles.

This past Sunday, however, I got sick. Really sick. Not able to hold down food sick. I tried to stick it out on Monday at work, but to no avail. Thankfully, I was able to get in to see my primary care doctor, and he felt around my abdomen. It was tender, and he felt a lump he knew didn't belong where it was on my right side.

Blood work was done on Monday and I called and scheduled a CT scan for this morning. I'd never had one before and because I'm allergic to sea food, this was a bit challenging, because that also means I'm allergic to certain types of iodine. There is an iodine solution that gets injected into you via IV for the CT scan.

We were able to get that worked out and I went this morning for the scan. It was like something from outer space, but not as loud as an MRI. Those you have to use headphones for because of the rapping sound of the machine while it takes the pictures.

I went back home and called the doctor's office to let them know that I took the test this morning, and I was informed that the blood work showed an infection, which would account for the vomiting, diarreah and fever I've had since Sunday. I also informed them, as was requested by the lab technicians, that I should not be on my diabetes medication for the next few days as my liver needs a chance to heal from the injection I got today.

I got a call back from the doctor's office a few hours later, asking me to come in to see the doctor. My CT scans had come back and I knew if they were asking me to see the doctor that something must be up. I was right.

The doctor told me the lab reports came back with the news that I had a 13 cm cyst coming from my right ovary. That's right, 13 centimeters. It's roughly about the size of a grapefruit. I have no idea how long it's been there, as it was never discovered during my annual female checkups.

Both the cyst and the ovary are going to have to be removed and checked for cancer. They are also using the same batch of blood work from Monday to do a test called the CA 125 test, which checks for cancer cells in the bloodstream.

Yes, the "C" word was brought up. Back in 2003, I had surgery on my right breast to remove a lump that was questionable, and thankfully it was benign. I'm hoping I'll have the same blessings with this as well.

As far as my not having children are concerned, I knew, upon Decker's death, that children would not happen with me, at least not in this lifetime. When Decker died, so did my chances of having one or more children. But, the good news in this, with his resurrection will also be resurrected the opportunity to have children then. I have already cried these tears of disappointment, I don't need to shed them again. I know, beyond any doubt, if I can stay true to the Lord, His word will stay true with me.

Hopefully, though, this will straighten out the hormone issues that have plagued me since puberty, and I can get some feeling of balance in my life.