It was already a difficult day for Sarah, and she felt sad, on an emotional tightrope wondering if she could hang on. She sat in the back of the Relief Society room, looking around as the other sisters visited with each other. These were wives and mothers sharing the latest news in their families while Sarah had neither husband nor children.
She felt she didn’t belong, single in a world of families. She also didn’t dress with the latest clothing nor had the fashionable hair styles the other women adorned themselves with. Her small paycheck just couldn’t provide those kind of luxuries.
Sacrament Meeting had covered the importance of teaching children the Gospel of Jesus Christ, while Sunday School covered the importance of marriage in the covenant.
Once the opening hymn and prayer had been given in the Relief Society meeting, a young, newly married woman rose to give an announcement. She was dressed in a black skirt, a pink sweater, with brunette hair in pretty ringlets down her back. She had a bright smile and bounced as she spoke. “For our Enrichment Meeting this Tuesday evening, we will be learning some ballroom dancing from the Millers who are accomplished ballroom dancers! It’s couples only, but we’ll be having our Young Women provide the babysitting.” She sat down as quickly as she stood up.
Those sitting beside Sarah looked over at her and Sarah gave a shrug, but she looked over at the two sisters she had noticed before the meeting had begun. They both had grins of absolute delight as they looked at Sarah before turning toward each other, whispering. Tears began falling down Sarah’s cheeks, one ran down to her lips and she could taste the warm saltiness as her eyes stung, matching the pain in her heart.
What could Sarah do? The meeting moved on with the lesson, and while Sarah had the book in front of her, opened to the correct page, she could not focus on the lesson regarding the gifts of the Spirit. She thought about getting up and leaving, but that would be rude. She didn’t want to injure anyone’s feelings, or give those women the satisfaction of driving her out. She did the only thing she could think of, she prayed. She plead for peace to come. She gave it a few minutes, and her heart felt light and her tears subsided.
Once home from Church, the dam broke open and Sarah went to her bed and wept with wailing. It had been a while since she had cried like that, and she was not prone to public displays. She was thankful for the help she needed to hold back until she could be alone.
She pulled the box of tissues closer as she used bunches to blow her nose and dry her eyes. Pretty soon, the tears subsided and Sarah found herself tired and needing sleep.
“Be still, my child. Weep no more.” The deep voice spoke to her in darkness, but she was comforted by it. She knew this voice, it was the voice of the Shepherd of the lost, the Savior, Jesus Christ.
Peace filled her entire body, as she was enveloped in a warm blanket of love and acceptance. She relaxed and sank deeper, longing to be held and comforted.
Then she saw the Relief Society room again, only this time the Savior was sitting where she was. He was stooped over, weeping tears of anguish as the two women jeered with a wicked grin and derided Him. Sarah wanted to reach out and comfort Him, but she knew she was only there to observe. She could not influence the outcome of this scene.
At that moment all went black and she found herself on a hill standing at the base of three crosses. The bloodied body of the Savior was thrown to the ground. Sarah’s heart ached to help him. He was in agony. She saw Him being spat upon, and she looked to find it was the same two women who were spitting upon the Savior. Sarah felt pain and tears come again as she witnessed how Jesus was being treated.
Blackness came upon her again. The pain was lifted and her tears stopped. “Let it go, Sarah. Forgive them. They have done it unto Me.”
Sarah remembered no more until she awoke four hours later. The pain was gone, replaced with the peace that can only come from unconditional love, wrapping her like a warm blanket, sheltering her from the cold outside.
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